BEING CAREFUL WITH CHOICE.
11 years in 2020! That seems like a DOUBLE dial of celebration of marital experience for me.
Exactly 11years ago I made my SPOUSAL. CHOICE. The gist of how we met has been told in past anniversary note on this street.
Can I say I have a slice of experience to say Marriage is not a walk in the pack, you have to be careful with that autonomy called CHOICE. Seen, listened to and counseled many spouses. I have also daily learnt deeply from mine.
Well, HERE IS MY MESSAGE FOR THE WOULD- BE HUSBAND and WIFE.
The topic was MARRIAGE WITHOUT TEARS, my opening speech was a story.
She loved him so much, only for him to take her love for granted. In less than five years, his best job offer was coming from her and her hubby’s company unknowingly. They only met at the lobby. All she said was it was good that I MISSED your type to MEET my type.
There is someone to miss in order to meet the right person and there is someone you mustn’t miss to live whole.
Some years ago, I was invited to speak to a gathering of marriageable singles about the topic “Marriage without Tears”.
so I began with this…. IGNORANCE is the easiest path to tears. Tears come from pain and pain comes mistakes and carelessness. Both are offspring of ignorance.
I went further..
If you don’t have a job, you are not in the presence of God, you can’t cultivate a woman, have no self clarity.. It is best for you to be alone.
Then I pulsed and said ..YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHOOSE BUT BE CAREFUL WHO BECOMES YOUR CHOICE.
Three (3) factors to consider before your choice.
1. Be Convinced
2. Be Prepared/Ready/ Matured
3. Be Committed and communicate sincerely.
Marriage is a long term journey that life would severely test your choice!
If you CAN’T BELIEVE in HIM or HER, LET HIM or HER GO.
If you are not going to CONTINUALLY RESPECT and HONOR HIM or HER, DONT FOOL THE JOURNEY. Why? TIME and CIRCUMSTANCES will QUESTION that COMMITMENT!
Sentiments can be fatal, ensure you are objective, realistic and reasonable. IF YOU CANT TRUST HIM/HER, Don’t marry Him/Her!
Don’t undervalue what will be permanent and overvalued what will be temporary. I repeat, Many things are still going to happen in future that will confirm the folly or wisdom of your choice.
Love is not enough, knowledge is important, wisdom and discernment are needful.
Choice is very difficult with ignorance, option become more of confusion than a guide to selection.
God gave man the liberty of choice but LEFT US WITH a GUIDE. The Bible and Our Reasoning! God has made man right but his choice can make his life wrong.
The physical appearance of a man is the lowest assessment of his or her Person.
There are handsome fools, there are handsome animals. Abigail said her husband acted his nature. Folly!
There are beautiful strangers and there are beautiful betrayers. Delilah lured Samson into love and nailed him without remorse.
Until they manifest, you may never know, except you can discern the other eye.
You will need more Money in Marriage Than Wedding. Don’t be wealthy at the wedding but broke in the marriage! Understand the new age poverty. Marriage needs money plus wisdom! Those are not shelf items or classroom privileges. Hunger and love rarely mix well.
Poverty has evolved, poverty is popular, lives in glass house, drives a nice car and even got a corner office but his reasoning and financially broke. Money is crucial to marital bliss.
Tears and pain are easy with IGNORANCE!
Choice may have options but selection demands care. The real man isn’t external. It’s intranal and interpersonal.
Maturity is the strength of your bond despite differential and the elasticity of your Agreement. Babies don’t marry even though marriage makes babies.
Maturity is not how old you are but HOW HAPPY your CHOICES MAKE YOU.
Maturity is the fear of of God! Why? There are things you will do or won’t do just because of the fear of God not because of your spouse.
Maturity means you can forgive and you are reasonably tolerant!
Don’t be too excited by the head of a scorpion, watch the tail. Poison for tears.
Can you see his tail? Do you know her venom?
May you be sensitive enough to let go/separate from whom you are to miss so that you can meet the right spouse.
Think about how your choice would look like in 5,10,15,20,30 years?
Know what you want but most importantly know what you need.
Let your tears be tears of joy and not of pain!
Be Careful when Choosing your Spouse.
What do you think?
PS: Happy Wedding Anniversary my choice Linda Afolabi.
PSS: Like to know more about Relationship and Marriage Improvement Wisdom? Then, Register for my Relationship & Marriage Improvement Masterclass. It’s AFFORDABLE.
BEING CAREFUL WITH CHOICE.